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What it’s like to live with a Generalised Anxiety Disorder

by Grishma Indap
0 comment 4 minutes read
Generalised Anxiety Disorder

We all have someone in our lives who experiences anxiety. That someone who turns up late, or cancels plans at the last moment, who takes forever to make a decision, worries and overthinks a lot or takes random days off, if you relate to these instances, welcome to the gang, even I’m part of this gang!

There’s nothing wrong to accept that you’ve anxiety disorder since it can develop in anyone from a child to an adult. Living with Generalized Anxiety Disorder can be long-term. Forgetting a not so important homework would also feel like the end of the entire school career while sleeping you tend to stay awake at night in the fear of losing someone or if I drive a car in 3rd gear it would come under the truck and booking a cab is always a huge deal for me. I realized that I’m weird or acting weird, I didn’t know back then, that I was suffering from Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD)

This mind sounds a little unusual but when I found out I have an anxiety disorder it brought me relief because finally, I got a name for my struggle. Now I can see the signs. My GAD symptoms include muscle tension, body aches, behavioral changes like procrastination or isolation, constant worry, and mood swings. Many researchers believe that there’s a strong correlation between anxiety and social media. For me, social media can be part of my anxiety but I can’t put complete blame. Because I didn’t get a smartphone until my 2nd year of High school and my anxious thoughts are forever. Although, if you speak in terms of today’s world I experience feelings of low-esteem and self-isolation from comparing my life or body with others.

I remember once I was watching this movie where the protagonist’s husband dies in a car crash. So, for the whole month whenever my boyfriend used to drop me home, I worried that a drunk driver would hit him and wondered how I would live without him and I would always lose myself in all the minute. The same happened to me again, when I saw this news about a Terror attack, I would spend time lying in bed thinking that we will all die one day after the bomb blast.

You will also find me constantly stressing over making the wrong decision. Choosing something or talking with strangers is too much to handle. These were all my excessive thoughts which result in overthinking my future instead of living in the present.

These constant worries make me insane at times, you just can’t focus, always feel irritated, and find yourself in disturbed sleep. These worries usually come back. Whenever it does, I find myself watching animal videos or simply calling the therapist. It takes constant work to bash out those thoughts. It’s like a creepy shadow, lurking behind you and threatening you with such thoughts. These negative thoughts are like a villain in anyone’s lives who are diagnosed with an Anxiety disorder. But, there are people in life where they get extra patient and kind, while I’m in the beast mode. It makes life scary for those who live with it and people around them, We just can’t simply ignore or stop thinking. Right psychiatric, therapist and mindfulness can help to treat your excessive thoughts.

Whenever I feel anxious I pull myself out from people and try to calm myself first. Start engaging in some activities like drawing or watching funny videos this makes my mind busy. Anxiety can make us believe that we’re alone with this weird thinking process. You’re wrong! You can always find a trusted person with whom you can talk to. Being open with people about your struggle allows them to enter your space of sharing struggles.

Anxiety is something you can find in many people. You must accept your anxious feelings because of its not a flaw. Finding support like a Therapist or a Psychiatrist will help you to have a support system with your thoughts. Eat right and sleep right. Mindfulness always worked for me, like working on deep breathing techniques. Just slow down yourself, if you find yourself hyper anticipating about your future, learn to live in the moment. Calm the need of thinking ‘what if’ this will automatically heal you with your anxious thoughts for the moment.

There are so many people out there struggling to live with mental illness who are not aware as we are. So, let’s make mental health priority in our lives.

It’s important to acknowledge, accept the journey, and embrace the opportunity to self-love and self-care. Improving your mental health is the most beautiful journey. You can always find resources and coping techniques to help yourself. Learn to navigate your triggers.

Remember there’s nothing wrong or shameful to reach for help. You just have to reach out. If we come together we can make this happen. We all must truly believe that.

If you have your own story, you can share it with us on contactus@myblogus.com or join #MyBlogUs community, so you can let others know that they are not alone.  

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